Where is God in my specific pain?
God is not distant from your pain; He is near to it. He knows your specific tears, He is with you in the valley, and He has entered suffering Himself in Christ. His presence in pain is not a vague comfort but a covenant promise, and He is working even the deepest valley toward good.
This question arose from studying Why does God allow suffering and evil?.
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What the Scripture says
God draws near to the broken
The psalmist says it plainly: 'Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit.' God does not wait for you to be whole before He comes close; He is nearest when you are most broken. He heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds, and He says He dwells with the contrite and humble to revive their spirit.
Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit.The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds.He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.
For thus says the high and lofty One who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: “I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also who is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite.For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones.
He knows your specific pain
Your suffering is not anonymous to God. The psalmist could say to Him, 'You number my wanderings. You put my tears into your bottle.' Jesus taught that the very hairs of your head are numbered. This is not a God who handles suffering in general; this is a God who knows exactly what you are carrying, and who has counted it.
You number my wanderings. You put my tears into your bottle. Aren’t they in your book?Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in thy book?
but the very hairs of your head are all numbered.But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
Yahweh, you have searched me, and you know me. You know my sitting down and my rising up. You perceive my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word on my tongue, but, behold, Yahweh, you know it altogether.O Lord, thou hast searched me, and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought afar off. Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, thou knowest it altogether.
He is with you in the valley
The twenty-third psalm does not promise we will never walk through the valley; it promises the Shepherd is there: 'Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.' God's word through Isaiah is the same: 'When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.' And He adds, 'Don't you be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you.' His presence is the promise: He is with you always, even to the end of the age, a stronghold in the day of trouble who knows those who take refuge in Him.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness.Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned, and flame will not scorch you.When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
teaching them to observe all things that I commanded you. Behold, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.
Christ entered our suffering Himself
In Gethsemane, Jesus said His soul was exceedingly sorrowful even to death, and He prayed that the cup might pass. He was 'a man of suffering, and acquainted with disease,' and at the tomb of His friend the Scriptures record two words: 'Jesus wept.' He does not watch our pain from a distance; He has known it, and He is able to help those who are suffering and tempted.
Then he said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here, and watch with me.” He went forward a little, fell on his face, and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass away from me; nevertheless, not what I desire, but what you desire.”Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here, and watch with me. And he went a little further, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt.
He was despised, and rejected by men; a man of suffering, and acquainted with disease. He was despised as one from whom men hide their face; and we didn’t respect him.He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
Jesus wept.Jesus wept.
For in that he himself has suffered being tempted, he is able to help those who are tempted.For in that he himself hath suffered being tempted, he is able to succour them that are tempted.
For we don’t have a high priest who can’t be touched with the feeling of our infirmities, but one who has been in all points tempted like we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore draw near with boldness to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy, and may find grace for help in time of need.For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.
He is working it toward good, and one day He will wipe every tear
For those who love God, all things work together for good, even the things that feel nothing like good today. God is 'the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction' so that we can comfort others. And the end is not vague; it is a promise: 'He will wipe away from them every tear from their eyes... The first things have passed away.' Even on the darkest day, He does not cast off forever; though He cause grief, He will have compassion, and He does not afflict willingly. Courage: in the world you have trouble, but He has overcome the world.
We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose.And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, through the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.
He will wipe away from them every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; neither will there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain, any more. The first things have passed away.”And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
I have told you these things, that in me you may have peace. In the world you have oppression; but cheer up! I have overcome the world.”These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
For the Lord will not cast off forever. For though he cause grief, yet he will have compassion according to the multitude of his loving kindnesses. For he does not afflict willingly, nor grieve the children of men.For the Lord will not cast off for ever: But though he cause grief, yet will he have compassion according to the multitude of his mercies. For he doth not afflict willingly nor grieve the children of men.
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Does God use our failures for our good?→Our Walk with Him trail“As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save many people alive.But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.”Why does God seem silent when I pray?→Prayer trail“Wait for Yahweh. Be strong, and let your heart take courage. Yes, wait for Yahweh.Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.”Can I be anxious and still trust God?→Anxiety & Peace trail“Why are you in despair, my soul? Why are you disturbed within me? Hope in God! For I shall still praise him for the saving help of his presence.Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted in me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance.”We haven't written this one yet. Take it to your church or small group: the Word answers it wherever it is asked. If we study it here later, all the better.
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Verses to meditate on
Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit.The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness.Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, through the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.
I have told you these things, that in me you may have peace. In the world you have oppression; but cheer up! I have overcome the world.”These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
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